A while back, I shared with you a story about a particularly unforgettable
Prince concert I went to. Here's a short history of some more memorable shows I've seen, 1993-1999:
The First One:
Smashing Pumpkins, December 1993
The Agora, Cleveland, OH
My first concert was
supposed to be U2 during the
Achtung Baby tour. Victor and I had just started dating and he bought me a ticket. I asked my dad if I could go. His rule was that I could do whatever, as long as I was home by 10:30. Since the show was in Cleveland, that wasn't possible, so I thought he would make an exception. He said no. The anger I felt toward my father—I don't believe there are adequate words in the English language to describe it. Let's just say that if I were animated, you know, a cartoon, there would have been smoke pouring out of my ears.
So Victor took his ex-girlfriend and, in between plotting my father's demise, I stayed up all night wondering if they were going to get back together. They didn't, and regular readers know that Victor and I ended up having quite a long run together, but I never got over how furious I was with my dad. The following spring, I had another opportunity to see a band I really liked, The Sundays, but by the time Dad finally agreed to let me go, the tickets were sold out.
So when the Smashing Pumpkins announced their
Siamese Dream tour that fall, I decided, "Fuck it. I'm going." And I was first in line at the Eastwood Mall's Ticketmaster counter (located inside Kaufmann's, near the salon) when they went on sale. Gearing up for a fight, I went home and very calmly informed Dad that I was going to the show and there was nothing he could do to stop me. He looked at me and said, "Okay." And I was all, "blink blink." Parents. Sometimes they are a mystery.
I spent the entire show with my jaw dropped; this was the coolest thing I'd ever seen. The lights were so well choreographed. The sound was fantastic, really full and rich. Being there, I felt like I was truly part of something, that these alterna-kids were
my people, making Warren seem even smaller and more backwater than it did already.
The One Where I Was Hit with a Beer Bottle:
Live, with Weezer supporting, October 1994
The Newport, Columbus, OHWeezer rocked. They were unbelievable. I think they opened with "My Name Is Jonas," and man, it was loud and raw and made my ears bleed, but it was really and truly rock and roll, live, in the flesh, like I'd never seen or heard it before. I stayed in the pit, pressed up against the stage for the entire set.
Then Live comes out. They were riding a pretty big wave of success thanks to an inescapable radio schmaltz-fest called "Lightning Crashes." That song is so goddamn milquetoast, man. Anyway, not surprisingly, when they played "Lightning Crashes," the birkenstocks-khaki slacks-hacky sacks (apologies to
MC Paul Barman) meatheads in the crowd pulled out their lighters and started singing along, arms slung across each other's shoulders in a pleasingly homoerotic way (though they'd for sure beat your ass for suggesting such a thing).
I'm trying to maneuver away from this ginormous meathead because he's getting uncomfortably close to me and I can't breathe. Victor keeps nudging him but the meathead keeps weaving and swaying around; it looks like he's going to fall on top of one of us. Finally, I push my way over to the edge of the floor and just as I'm about to climb out of the pit, the meathead, for some inexplicable reason, turns around and breaks his beer bottle (Rolling Rock) over my arm. Amazingly, this does not hurt or injure me. I toss my beer in his face and haul ass out of there.
The One Where I Took a Black Pyramid Gel Tab:
The Black Crowes, October 1996
The Palace Theatre, Columbus, OHThere wasn't enough acid to go around. We hadn't been expecting Jacey to come, but he showed up at our apartment with a ticket and so he was with us. Because these were gel tabs and not your standard blotter paper acid, we were not in the position to split it a hit with Jacey. He looked so disappointed. Victor ran up to our room and looked for some old magic mushrooms he had lying around. "Here," he handed the graying baggie to Jacey, "there's peanut butter in the kitchen. Hope these are still good." And Jacey skipped off to make a peanut-butter-and-shroom sandwich.
We, Victor, me, Money Mark, Jacey, and Crohn, took our assorted hallucinogens, sat, and waited. We looked around at each other and our watches, wanting not to be in transit when we started to trip, but wanting to feel something before we left. It was Jacey who broke the silence: "I think…wait…no, really, yeah! I'm seeing spots! You know, like, dots. Of light! It's so cool!"
"Great," Money Mark laughed, "Jacey gets the old-ass mushrooms and he's tripping balls while the rest of us are sitting here like assholes."
About 10 minutes later, we were down on the sidewalk walking to the bus stop when we heard a "Bah ha ha! Heh." coming from Money Mark. He was grinning and waving his hand in front of his face. "I think this stuff is good, you guys." As soon as he said that, I remember looking up at the street lamp and noticing that the halo surrounding it was spinning.
I don't remember much else from then on. Just bits and pieces. There were a lot of biker-types at the show. Everything was extremely bright. The
backdrop was lovely. "She Gave Good Sunflower" and "Remedy" sounded like the band was playing them just for me on a tiny stage in the palm of my hand.
The One Where I Missed Pretty Much the Entire Show:
Iggy Pop, October 1999
The Metro, Chicago, ILI can't remember who said it, but somebody said, "There's going to be some lame opening act and frankly, I'm too old to have to watch crap opening acts." If I had to bet money, I'd say that came from Ruby. So Ruby, Pimento, and I sat in their apartment and drank a lot of Bass. We didn't leave for the Metro until something like, 10 PM. When we got there, Iggy was on stage doing his Iggy thing, and based on the sweat-level, it looked like he'd been up there a while. We heard him sing "T.V. Eye," "No Fun," "Now I Wanna Be Your Dog," "Louie, Louie," and "Johnny B. Goode." Then it was over and we went home.
